True Hope

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;

his mercies never come to an end;

they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

"The Lord is my portion," says my soul,

"therefore I will hope in Him."

~ Lamentations 3:22-24

A Prayer as I Grow Older

There was a time when I would have prayed this for others…now, I'm beginning to see that I need to pray it for myself. I just want to be like my Grandma Morrison when I grow up (okay…old)…the Lord granted her what this dear saint prayed:

Lord, thou knowest better than I know myself that I am growing older and will someday be old.

Keep me from the fatal habit of thinking I must say something on every subject and on every occasion.

Release me from craving to straighten out everybody's affairs.

Make me thoughtful but not moody; helpful but not bossy.

With my vast store of wisdom it seems a pity not to use it all, but thou knowest Lord that I want a few friends at the end.

Keep my mind free from the recital of endless details; give me wings to get to the point.

Seal my lips on my aches and pains. They are increasing and the love of rehearsing them is becoming sweeter as the years go by.

I dare not ask for grace enough to enjoy the tales of others' pains, but help me to endure them with patience.

I dare not ask for improved memory, but for a growing humility and a lessening cocksureness when my memory seems to clash with the memories of others.

Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be mistaken.

Keep me reasonably sweet; I do not want to be a saint - some of them are so hard to live with - but a sour old person is one of the crowning works of the devil.

Give me the ability to see good things in unexpected places, and talents in unexpected people.

And, give me, O Lord, the grace to tell people about it.

For all our sakes,

Amen.

~ A Mother Superior's Prayer

Who Shall Deliver Me?

God strengthen me to bear myself;
That heaviest weight of all to bear,
Inalienable weight of care.

All others are outside myself;
I lock my door and bar them out
The turmoil, tedium, gad-about.

I lock my door upon myself,
And bar them out; but who shall wall
Self from myself, most loathed of all?

If I could once lay down myself,
And start self-purged upon the race
That all must run ! Death runs apace.

If I could set aside myself,
And start with lightened heart upon
The road by all men overgone!

God harden me against myself,
This coward with pathetic voice
Who craves for ease and rest and joys

Myself, arch-traitor to myself ;
My hollowest friend, my deadliest foe,
My clog whatever road I go.

Yet One there is can curb myself,
Can roll the strangling load from me
Break off the yoke and set me free

~Christina Rossetti

A Book of Comfort, by Elizabeth Goudge

My friend Linda Dean introduced me to the novels and writings of Elizabeth Goudge years ago. Yesterday I pulled this anthology of poetry and prose from my shelf to peruse again.  I love this quote this from her preface, describing the comfort which books give us…

"…What are the sources of comfort to which we turn in what Saint Augustine…calls "our mortal weariness"?  The answer is that our existence is as light with comfort as it is weighted with weariness.  The sources of our comfort are legion, and cannot be counted, but if we attempted the impossible and tried to make a list most of us would place books very high indeed, perhaps second only to faith, for reading is not only a pleasure in itself, with its concomitants of stillness, quietness and forgetfulness of self, but in what we read many of our other comforts are present with us like reflections seen in a mirror.  If the light of our faith flickers we can make it steady again by reading of the faith of the saints, and hearing poetry sing to us the songs of the lovers of God.  In the absence of children we can read about them, and in the cold and darkness of midwinter, look in the mirror of our book and see flowers and butterflies, and spring passing into the glow and warmth of summer…"

I also like her "categories" of comforting things (from the table of contents):

We Are Comforted When We Consider the Glory and Wisdom of Creation… The Comfort We Have in Delighting in Each Other… The Comfort of Faith… The Comfort We Have in Living in the World of Imagination

Elizabeth Goudge (1900-1984) was the daughter of a clergyman of the Church of England. You can read more about her here, and see the extensive bibliography of her works.  A couple of my favorites are The Dean's Watch;  a trilogy about the fictional Eliot family: The Bird in the Tree, The Herb of Grace (also published under the title The Pilgrim's Inn), and The Heart of the Family; and her children's fairy tale, Linnets and Valerians, which I read for the first time last week, and which I thoroughly enjoyed!

Stop Tinkering

“Like the eye which sees everything in front of it and never sees itself, faith is occupied with the Object upon which it rests and pays no attention to itself at all. While we are looking at God, we do not see ourselves--blessed riddance. The man who has struggled to purify himself and has had nothing but repeated failures will experience real relief when he stops tinkering with his soul and looks away to the perfect One.”
... A. W. Tozer (1897-1963), The Pursuit of God [1948]

I need this relief. Badly.

Twenty Years Ago...

Last month...



My prayer my sweet sons today:

As he pursues his heavenly journey by Thy grace
let him be known as a man with no aim
but that of a burning desire for Thee,
and the good and salvation of His fellow man.
~Divine Support, The Valley of Vision

Give him a desire to show forth Thy praise,
testify Thy love,
advance Thy kingdom.
~New Year, The Valley of Vision

Light Enough to See My Darkness

from the Valley of Vision, Mortification:

...I have light enough to see my darkness,
sensibility enough to feel the hardness of my heart,
spirituality enough to mourn my want of a heavenly mind...

True words...true of this heart and life. When I look at myself and realize the truth of these words, and the struggle Paul portrays of my life in Romans 7, I am tempted to despair. But...

"Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!...There is therefore now NO CONDEMNATION for those who are in Christ Jesus." ~ Romans 7:25a, 8:1

All the more reason to look to Christ instead of myself, and what I can do in my frail flesh.

Good news. Gospel. Christians need it...every day!

Epiphany

Today is Epiphany, according to the church calendar.

On his excellent and informative blog, Grantian Florilegium, George Grant writes:

The celebration of Epiphany is the culmination of what is traditionally called the "Twelve Days of Christmas." The word literally means “revelation” or “sudden unveiling” or “manifestation.”

The day, which historically has been celebrated with as much joy as Christmas, Easter, and Pentecost, commemorates the day when wise men from the East were conducted by a miraculous star to the nativity in Bethlehem. The Magi were thus the first to comprehend that Jesus was not merely the prophetic fulfillment of Jewish aspirations since the beginning of time. Instead, He was the hope of the world, the light of the world, and the joy of every man’s desiring. They beheld the very glory of God that day--for in the city of David, the Savior was born.

As a result, Epiphany is the celebration of the ultimate proclamation of good news. Good news, indeed.

Epiphany was the name of our Episcopal (Anglican!) church years ago…our mission statement was “to make Christ known to the world.” Yes, indeed, good news!

The traditional collect from the Book of Common Prayer for Epiphany:

O God, who by the leading of a star didst manifest thy only-begotten Son to the peoples of the earth: Lead us, who know Thee now by faith, to Thy presence, where we may behold Thy glory face to face; through the same Jesus Christ our Lord, who liveth and reigneth with Thee and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever. Amen.

My Prayer

Almighty God, You alone can bring into order the unruly wills and affections of sinners. Grant Your people grace to love what you command and desire what You promise: that, among the swift and varied changes of the world, our hearts may surely there be fixed where true joys are to be found: through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with You and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever. Amen.

Collect for 5^th Sunday after Lent
Book of Common Prayer